By Anna Pospieszynska
Be a hero. Rescue damsels in distress. Cherish the day. Apparently such an attitude seemed twisted even in the Crusaders’ time, when two knights are forced to fight against poor road conditions and hyperactive children of the night. Leslie Nielsen would know how to handle it. A gloomy time when outsiders were treated to a rotten apple and heavy blows. A time of ghastly clearings filled with hanged people swaying in the wind on suspicion of practiced witchcraft, when the argument that “They’ve been hanged and drowned. That’s dead enough for me” was not sufficient. Welcome to Season of the Witch.
Set in the 13th century, the story opens with a witch trial held in a small village. After three women have been executed by hanging and drowning, the local priest decides to conduct rituals to prevent demonic kittens from returning from the grave. Unfortunately, his attempt to exorcise fails with unpleasant consequences for the poor old chap. In a jiffy, the action jumps a century ahead to the time of the Soldiers of Christ. Tired of constant bloodshed, knights Behmen (Cage) and Felson (Perlman) desert the war and try to return to normal life. During their journey home they discover a mysterious plague spreading across the lands. Along the way they are recognized and imprisoned only to be asked to escort a young girl to a distant monastery, where she is to be examined and stripped of her evil powers thus ending the epidemic. The merry troupe is accompanied by God-fearing priest Debelzaq, an amorous young man named Kay, the grieving knight Eckhardt and the pragmatic swindler Hagamar. Their mission to end the plague and save the holy. And perhaps to save Anna, the girl apparently possessed by a nasty piece of evil.
What struck me about this movie is the fact that I actually watched it to the end. Perhaps because of the shimmering resemblance to Sorcerer’s Apprentice and The Brothers Grimm that floated in the air. Nicholas Cage just did not cast light on my tired eyelids, instead sticking simply to the role of a good uncle, without the old man’s pointy shoes. No wand for you this time – which seems reasonable under the circumstances. Hellboy star Perlman was unexpectedly blurred, leaving no distinct traces of his appearance apart from the red tail. His comments did not arouse the imagination or sense of humor. These two seemed oddly misplaced, as if borrowed from the wrong genre. The most interesting character is the least talkative, instead deriving her fascination from facial expressions. Claire Foy has everything a proper witch ought to have: a petite figure, innocent face, long dark hair and huge blue puddles as eyes. She manipulates the others, pushing boundaries and confronting their suspicious beliefs. She becomes a focal point for the story, not only because of her physical environment – imprisoned in a cage surrounded by men – but also through the spells she casts, forcing the cast into action.
Dead Space 2 scared the life out of me. Abnormal creatures wander through a spaceship, ready to tear you into pieces. You have to hide from the huge Necromorphs and run from tiny knife-handed toddlers. In comparison, Season of the Witch is a nice fairytale for those aged 16+. One possible rainy-day alternative to clay workshops and bridge with the grandparents.
